Attitude Is Everything

I love sharing my client’s stories through portraits and interviews.

Rebecca is a local attorney who participated in the 40 over 40 project to celebrate turning 40. I loved how much energy Rebecca brought to her session, her smiles and laughter were contagious. Balancing work and family is no easy task and Rebecca was not afraid to highlight those struggles.

My hope for those reading her story and others, is that the reader will feel less alone in their own personal struggles. Life is tough but as Rebecca mentions “attitude can take you places money can’t ever.” Here are a few snippets from her interview.

What made you get pictures done?

Well… 40 I think is a monumental birthday and I think everyone has gone through a lot of changes particularly over the last few years with COVID. I wanted to celebrate a new chapter, so I thought how better to do it then getting fancy and have some pictures made.

How do you think the definition of beauty has changed over the years?

I think as all girls are trained from early childhood, we are so image conscious about how we look and how we dress. I feel like as I have gotten older how I have felt more beautiful. It didn’t really have to do with how I looked, it was about being strong. It was about spending time with my son and watching him grow. All the things that make me feel beautiful, sometimes make me feel like I look less beautiful because I’m tired, no time for makeup and the wrinkles grow. It’s just a different kind of beauty and I want to embrace that.

What would you tell your 20-year-old self?

Travel. Take every foreign travel opportunity that you can and do it while you’re young enough and unencumbered to do it. And I would tell myself to be more gentle on myself.

When do you feel you were the most confident in life?

After my son was born, I went back to trial practice. I was very nervous about the ability to essentially have it all. And I don’t think you can, I don’t think you can have a full tilt practice and be a stay-at-home mom and work. But I was able to, with some really good mentoring, set very clear boundaries, so that I could really savor the time with the baby, really still take a lot of pleasure in litigation practice, and have time for my family. The confidence in me was learning to have my own voice, set my own boundaries, and then when I opened my own law practice, I made that even more important. Because I adore what I do but I do it so I have time to my family. Setting those boundaries gave me a lot of strength and I was lucky to have lawyer mentors early in my practice to help me do that and try to mentor other young lawyers particularly mothers to say, set those boundaries really hard because they’re only going to be little once.

What advice would you give a young mom?

Don’t be afraid to be selfish. I think it’s so hard, particularly with new babies and my son is almost six, but when he was very very little, I wanted to do it all on my own. I wanted to just be Wonder Woman. Do the job, do the baby, all the things and I was kind of reluctant to let people help me because I felt like that was selfish and they all had their own families, their own children to deal with. I would tell a young mom don’t be afraid to be a little selfish. If your best friend comes over let her fold the laundry, let her wash the dishes and go take a nap!

How would the people around you describe you?

I’m the problem solver of the group. My mom has called me the “Little Churchill” since I was about four years old because I was always trying to work together and reconcile their problems. Whether it was my siblings or my friends, so I’m definitely the “mother hen” problem solver of our friend group.

What is it that you do for a career?

I am an attorney, I have a statewide family court litigation practice. I’ve been in practice on my own for four years. But I have been doing domestic law for about twelve years.

What motivates you to wake up in the morning?

Two things, one is I am just so passionate about what I do for a living. My mom jokes that somehow, I was able to monetize the fact that I like to “loaf” (which is a southern term for just drive around) and that I’m really good in a crisis. So, I take a lot of pleasure in helping people in a really vulnerable time. The other thing is my son, he is my sunshine! He is an only child. I love being able to savor every stage of his life. He’s been such a practice in mindfulness for me and also help me be mindful about appreciating the good stuff about each stage of my life too.

What advice would you give your son?

I think we are raising boys in a very difficult time, our little boys only get to have one feeling, and that translates to big boys and to men. They have to be tough, they have to be strong and they’re not encouraged to be gentile and vulnerable and he thankfully is a very gentile person and from today right on until he’s 50 I want him to hold onto that piece. Because there are lots of ways to be a man, you can be a boxer and you can be a veterinarian and all those things are ok and they require different skillsets but it doesn’t make you any less of a man.

What is your favorite quote or scripture?

“Attitude can take you places money can’t ever”

Be sure to click on the video and hear Rebecca in her own words. Hair and makeup by @beautybylizyturria. For more information on the 50 over 50 portraits, please visit www.brandiblake.com/over50